Ping Pong Plan

Alternate title: The Preposterous Push-off Ping Pong Pinball Plan. Could I have worked in more “P” words? MAYBE!

In other news, COVID has got me thinking about how I want to approach future print releases for Hell, Inc. The vast majority of my book sales, outside of Kickstarters for product launches, come from doing conventions and book fairs. I have been able to sell Hell, Inc. books at exactly one (1) event since the launch last year, and it’s not looking like 2020/21 will have a busy convention season. Is it a good idea to carry on with my plan to Kickstart books 3-4 and 5-6? Or maybe I should just wait and do a collected edition with all six books once they’re done. Thoughts, dear reader? As the target audience for those books, I value your input on the topic.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Sebastian is Employee of the Week, and you can, too! If you think what I do here with Hell, Inc. is worth a dollar, head over to the Patreon and be rewarded with early access to the digital version of Hell, Inc. Vol. 3: “Team-building Exercise” as well as over 1000 pages of digital comics!

You can also vote for Hell, Inc. on Top Webcomics, which is the comic’s largest source for new readers. A lot of you have been voting, and it’s been very helpful – Hell, Inc. has consistently been hanging around some much more established and popular comics in the rankings, which is pretty cool. Click on the banner to vote!

Next Week: We meet Diane, who does not have a great sense of who the people in the office are. Read it early on Patreon!

Office Ninja

The chair stealing subplot involved a lot of things that were really easy to write, but much more difficult to draw. There’s a lot of messing around with camera angles and the flow of panels to make it as interesting as possible within the strip format.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Jillian Dolan is Employee of the Week! She is also a comic-smith, and you should check out her works, including Misha and Kyle the Nihilist Dinosaur. They’re delightful. If you think Hell, Inc. is delightful and want to support it with your hard-earned money, head over to the Hell, Inc. patreon. As a reward, new sign-ups gain access to a folder of over 1000 pages of comic, including the otherwise unreleased Hell, Inc. Vol. 3: “Team-building Exercise!”

You can also vote for Hell, Inc. on Top Webcomics, which is the number one source of new readers for the comic. Votes early in the month (for example, this week) are super valuable as the rankings reset at the beginning of the month. You can vote once per day, so click on the banner below to get voting!

Next Week: The Mission Impossible theme would be playing but I don’t have the rights to it so just hum it yourself. Read it early on Patreon!

The Mediocre-est Laid Plans

This strip is one I look forward to converting to Webtoon format in *checks calendar* at minimum 6 months from now. There are some jokes that are perfect for the infinite scroll format of Webtoon, and ones that involve waiting a long time for something are at the top of that list.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Cindy Gauthier is Employee of the Week, and can help fulfill all of your COVID-related mask needs. If you want to get your comics needs handled, support Hell, Inc. on Patreon, where you’ll get a digital copy of the aforementioned “Team-building Exercise” book (which includes a book-exclusive short story) as well as over 1000 pages of other comics!

You can also vote for Hell, Inc. on Top Webcomics, which is the number one source of new readers for the comic. Votes early in the month (for example, this week) are super valuable as the rankings reset at the beginning of the month. You can vote once per day, so click on the banner below to get voting!

Next Week: The great bad chair reverse-heist finally begins and sure is something. Read it early on Patreon!

Chair Crimes

I don’t know why, but I really like the device of having things written on sticky notes that function as their own panel. I also like using very dramatic shadows for something very stupid, like chair crimes. CHAIR CRIMES.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Robbie Dorman, host of The Simpsons Show podcast, is Employee of the Week. If you like Hell, Inc. you probably also like The Simpsons, because that’s pretty foundational to my sense of humour and how I write jokes, so you should listen to The Simpsons Show. If you like Hell, Inc. you probably also want to be Employee of the Week and help Hell, Inc. continue existing by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon. All new patrons are receiving a digital copy of Hell, Inc. Volume 3: Team-building Exercise, as well as access to a Dropbox folder with over 1000 pages of digital comics!

You can also vote for Hell, Inc. on Top Webcomics, which is a great way to help boost the comic’s visibility and bring in new readers. Click on the banner below to vote!

Next Week: I love it when a plan comes together. This isn’t one of those times, though. Read it early on Patreon!

You’re Scheming Too Loud

This scene exists because I initially had B.L. Zebub connecting the chair thing to Sara immediately and praising her for it, but as soon as I wrote it I realized that didn’t make any sense. So instead, Sara expects that because SHE knows what happened, it will be obvious to the person she’s trying to impress with it. But it isn’t, because why would it be? And then I got to draw Ray doing a weird looming stretch thing. That was pretty fun.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Welcome new hire Bartender of the Apocalypse, who presumably works at O’Hellihan’s. They’ve joined the ranks of Hell, Inc.’s Patreon supporters, who help keep this train on the tracks (or perhaps an office-related metaphor that means the same thing). You can do the same by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon for as little as $1, which gets you digital copies of just about everything I’ve done, as well as Hell, Inc. Volume 3: Team-building Exercise, which is only available on Patreon for the foreseeable future.

You can also help Hell, Inc. by voting for it on Top Webcomics, which is the primary source of new readers for the comic. You can vote daily by clicking on the banner below!

Next Week: CHAIR CRIMES. Support Hell, Inc. on Patreon, do Chair Crimes.

Forgot How to Chair

Remembering how to chair is a very important part of everyday life. I’m chair-ing right now as I type this update. I was chairing earlier as I was painting plastic Space Marines, which I have been doing quite frequently lately. I’ve also gotten a handful of Hell, Inc. strips drawn that I wasn’t expecting to have time for. I think I’ve been able to apply some of the stuff I’ve learned from the book project I’m contracted on to Hell, Inc., which has been kinda cool.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Sylvia Douglas is Employee of the Week. She has a whole bunch of projects on the go as a writer, film-maker, and waffle connoisseur, which you can check out from her website.  If you think what I do here with Hell, Inc. is worth a buck, head over to the Hell, Inc. Patreon. New patrons receive the third Hell, Inc. book, “Team-building Exercise,” which isn’t available anywhere else (and won’t be until whenever the next print book Kickstarter happens at some point in the future). There are also over a thousand pages of other comics available to patrons, so check those out. Patreon. Go there.

You can also help out Hell, Inc. by clicking on the banner below to vote on Top Webcomics, which is the number one source of new readers for the comic.

Next Week: Can you scheme somewhere else? It’s distracting. Read it early on Patreon!

Sneakity Swappity

Titles consisting entirely of made up words are the best titles, and you cannot convince me otherwise. Unless you can, I dunno, maybe you’re good at that, whatever, you’re not my boss. If comics didn’t have a very strong correlation between space and time, I would write so many weird stream-of-consciousness conversations and just let them spiral and see what happens.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Brien Aronov is Employee of the Week, and one of our longest standing employees. He started all the way back when I was drawing a comic about space wrestlers, and one of the first patrons! If you want to become the newest patron, head over to the Hell, Inc. Patreon, where readers like you help keep this operation financially viable. It’s currently only a few dollars shy of paying me the same per page as my first book contract!

You can also help Hell, Inc. by voting for it on Top Webcomics, which is one of the largest sources of new readers for the comic. Votes early in the month are worth even more, so get your vote on daily by clicking the banner below.

Next Week: There are no offers of raises, you didn’t hear anything. Read it early on Patreon!

The Bad Chair Wars

Assume the lightning panel is accompanied by a super sick guitar riff that shreds your soul. I know that’s a thing you can actually embed into comics on, like, Webtoon and stuff, but I don’t want to learn how to do that. I also don’t know how to play sick-ass guitar riffs. Also I hate it when Webtoon comics play music, because I never realize that’s where it’s coming from until I’m halfway through the comic and have paused or muted whatever other media is playing at the time.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Joe Amon is Employee of the Week! Thanks for supporting Hell, Inc. Joe! If YOU, dear reader, think Hell, Inc. is worth a buck and want to help support it, you can do that by heading over to the Patreon. New Patrons will be receiving a digital copy of Hell, Inc. Volume 3: “Team-building Exercise,” as well as over 1000 pages of other digital comics from my catalogue, as well as some from guest artist Lukasz Kowalczuk.

You can also vote for Hell, Inc. on Top Webcomics to help boost its rank and get more new readers.

Next Week: The ol’ sinister swappity swap. Read it early by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon!

Tetris Brain

And now the Tetris theme is stuck in your head, isn’t it? You’re welcome. Also someone who knows how to make video games should make Hell, Inc. Spreadsheet Tetris a thing. Email or DM me or something, let’s make this happen.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Cait is Employee of the Week both here and at her new soap company, Soaps & Sorcery. She is also the other person who is working from home in my art lair. Except not IN my art lair, she has her own work lair. It’s full of soap and also all of the books that I would normally be selling at conventions. If YOU want to be Employee of the Week and get a plug for your soap business or whatever, head over to the Hell, Inc. Patreon and help keep the lights on over here.

You can also vote for Hell, Inc. on Top Webcomics, which brings in a bunch of new readers. Click on the link below to vote, which you can do daily!

Next Week: The BAD CHAIR WARS *thunder and lightning*. Read it early on Patreon!

R.I.P. Your Butt

You can always tell which one is the bad chair, because, y’know, the seat is barely on it. And the backrest is creakily swinging off to the side. And one or more wheels are broken/missing. And because it looks like there’s scorpions or some shit inside of it.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Ben Hamlin is Employee of the Week. Ben is also in the business of keeping us all entertained during quarantine as a podcaster with the Infinity Break Network! If you think the entertainment you’ve been getting from Hell, Inc. is worth a dollar, check out the Hell, Inc. Patreon page and contribute to my only reliable source of quarantine income! Patrons have access to the third Hell, Inc. print book, including an exclusive short story, and over 1000 pages of other digital comics!

You can also help Hell, Inc. by voting for it on Top Webcomics, which is a big source of new readers for the comic. You can vote daily by clicking the link below!

Next Week: The Tetris theme is the only song, now. Read it early by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon!