What The Here?

“What the here?” is the most Steve Carrell in “The Office” that Zebub gets in the entire comic, I think. I mean, I haven’t written the whole thing, or even most of it, but that seems like the kind of thing Michael Scott would try to make catch on in an episode in the first few seasons. Unrelated, balloons where the text breaks out (“Doooooug!” in panel 1) are a huge pain in the ass all of a sudden. I used to be able to do them on the first try, no problem. Now? I’m pretty sure that one took as long as the rest of the lettering on the page combined. What the here?

Employee of the Week:

Damion, a longtime supporter of my previous webcomic, HEAT: The Space Age of Pro Wrestling, has remained on board for the transition to the new hotness (because Hell, get it?). Thanks, Damion! Want to be Employee of the Week like Damion? Donate $2 or more to the Hell, Inc. Patreon, because you like the comic and because capitalism forces us to use money to validate our existence.

Next Week: We learn a bit more about the capitalist hellscape of Hell. Patreon. Read early. I’ve written so many of these prompts to action that my brain is melting down.

Toner Rejected

This is the outcome that my brain always convinces me is ABSOLUTELY going to happen whenever I have to do the mildest equipment maintenance. I was putting ink cartridges in a new printer earlier, and spent most of that process terrified that I was somehow going to break the cartridge and spill ink all over my carpet. It’s an ink cartridge, the dumbest person in your office can change an ink cartridge without destroying the flooring, but that’s my brain in action.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Cait of the North! She definitely isn’t the employee of the week because we live in the same house. That’s crazy talk. You’re crazy. Follow her on Twitter. You too can become Employee of the Week by donating a few bucks to the Hell, Inc. Patreon page, which is how I make money on this thing, which is a requirement of our modern capitalist hellscape.

Next Week: What the here, Doug? What. The. Here. Read it early on Patreon!

Illusionary Photocopiers

I have returned from the Panel One Comic Creator Festival in Calgary, which means my hellish month of May will be over, which is AWESOME. It hasn’t been a bad month, by any stretch – I moved into my new home, I did several fun and lucrative conventions – but oh my god I’m tired all the time why can’t I sleep for a week bluuuuuh. Thanks to everyone at Panel One who stopped by to pick up some books and chat, and shout out to those of you who mentioned Hell, Inc. specifically. It’s always nice to get a reminder that those view count numbers are actual people.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Robbie Dorman is the Employee of the Week, and definitely hosts a podcast that aligns with your interests. Check out The Simpsons Show, which is exactly what you think it is from the title, and Serial Fanaticist, a podcast about stuff that people like.

Next Week: Doris is the MOST helpful. Find out how by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon.

The Daily Regret

The Daily Regret sounds like a very depressed newspaper.

I have returned from Auroracon in High Level, which was an incredible experience that has left me utterly exhausted. I had planned to get some work done on Sunday night after getting home, but instead I fell asleep on the couch after dinner. For 7 hours.

Next weekend is the AALT conference in Drumhellar, then I have a weekend off… to move into my new place. BRB dying.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK
How is an entire business the Employee of the Week? Shut up, that’s how. Thanks to Happy Harbor Comics for their patronage, as well as the fact that they carry all of my books and bring me to book fairs at schools and libraries across Alberta!

Next Week: The Intern. Read it early by becoming supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon!

An Accounting of Harpies

Drawing this scene was a really hard transition after several strips in the Arrivals area, which was close to the easiest possible locale to draw. The Real Break Room has so many more little touches to think about, like the magnets on the fridge, what’s in the fridge, how the word fridge is kinda fun to say… actually, no, that last one didn’t have anything to do with drawing.

You’re reading this after Calgary Expo, but I’m typing it a week in advance, because time travel exists now but only in kind of lame ways. Anyway, thanks to all of you who stopped by the booth to chat and buy stuff, and to all the cool new people I will presumably have met. Time travel!

Next Week: Regret. And, shockingly, it’s not Steve regretting eating those bees. Read it early by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon!

Definitely Delete The Search History

Welcome to the first normal week of Hell, Inc.! By “normal” I mean “one update.” The standard format going forward will be one new strip per week, on Mondays. I could, of course, be persuaded to increase that with liberal support of the Patreon. Other kinds of super helpful support include using those share buttons right above and below this post! The best promotion a comic can get is from people who are reading and enjoying it.

I make a lot of jokes to friends that the things I Google in the course of making comics probably has me on some kind of government watch list, but at this point, EVERYONE’s search history probably has them on a watch list that’s so bloated it’s unusable.

For those of you who might be at the Emerald City Comic Con from March 1st-4th, drop by the artist alley and say hi! I’ll be at table B10 with my Ape Court collaborator, Daniel Schneider. There’s only a 75% we’ll be talking about wrestling.

Next Week: The boss’ office. Read it a week early at the $1 level on Patreon!

The Beelzeboss

The last panel of this strip is essentially the entire premise of Hell, Inc. encapsulated into one image. Also, as someone who dislikes confrontation, yell-y bosses are nightmarish. As someone who mostly does freelance or wholly self-directed work, bosses in general have become a bizarre idea. As a freelancer, nobody is REALLY in charge, we’re just hoping something gets done so they don’t get yelled at by THEIR boss and I get paid. It’s kind of a cooperative thing, unless you’re freelancing for shitty clients who THINK they’re your boss.

Next Week: We settle into the regular schedule, and Doug settles into the Ouchy Chair. Only one half of that sentence makes sense at this point, but you can figure out the other half early by becoming a supporter on Patreon!