Nobody Reads the Fine Print

I really like getting to draw different areas of the Hell, Inc. building, because it lets me think about how to represent those areas. One of the more interesting (to me) elements of Hell, Inc.’s aesthetics is that everything needs to both look incredibly mundane but also weird and off-putting. In this case, the Infernal Pacts department features a huge, impenetrable stacks area for storage, capped off with little demons flitting around to add that sense of the impossible to it.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Despite her constant losses as Roommate of the Month to Very Good Dog(TM) Trina, Sylvia Douglas was able to score herself Employee of the Week. And how could she not, as proprietor of the Waffle Log Blog, the height of culinary culture. She’s also a filmmaker and does a bunch of other creative stuff that I won’t write down because I can’t remember all of it off the top of my head. What’s that? You also want to be Employee of the Month because you keep losing Roommate of the Month to the dog? Support Hell, Inc. on Patreon, because if you’re going to give your money to somebody, why not me instead of a billionaire that doesn’t think you’re a person?

Next Week: Could it be… could it be CANDIED SHEEP DAY!? Find out by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon.

And His Brain Vomited Forever

Happy New Year, this is strip number 50! Despite the technical difficulties early in the year, Hell, Inc. still managed to hit 50 pages in the first 11 months. That’s a pretty good start. It’s such a good start, that what could be the first Hell, Inc. print collection is done. I’m debating how big of a book I want to do for the first collection, but I’m leaning towards doing smaller, more frequent editions instead of waiting until I’ve got 150+ pages done and making a monster of a book like the HEAT one. I’ll have to price some stuff out and see how I can make the math work. But that will be a 2019 task, because for the rest of 2018, I’m playing games and colouring Hell, Inc. strips.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:
We’re back at the start of the rotation with Cait of the North. Follow her on Twitter, where she is better at promoting my comics than I am. What, putting the guy who just wants to stay at home and draw cartoon pictures all the time in charge of marketing is, perhaps, not a great business move? I don’t know what you’re talking about. You know what IS a great business move? Supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon. It keeps me, the dumbass artist, from having to do actual business shit all the time. Instead, I can make more comics to entertain you. So, Patreon. Go do it.

Next Week: The first Hell, Inc. of 2019, wherein Doug grows a backbone to replace the one his brain just vomited up. Read it early on Patreon!

Meat-ing

I don’t know if this is the dirtiest joke in the comic so far, but it’s probably the least subtle. Especially since it’s a Steve joke, and he allows me to exercise my desire to make terrible jokes with full belief that they’re funny.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Robbie Dorman, host of the Simpsons Show and Serial Fanatacist podcasts, is the Employee of the Week. I just mailed his Hockeypocalypse Season 4 book. He also has a Patreon, perhaps consider throwing him a few bucks as well, yes? CORPORATE SYNERGY. If you want to get in on the corporate synergy, support the Hell, Inc. Patreon so I can keep using the corporate gold card.

Next Week: Gotta get some jet fuel, and things get weird in the Real Break Room. Get into the Real Break Room on Patreon.

How!?

That’s a very good question, Willis. Doug’s drawing reminds me of the drawings I used to do on the back of tests. I never liked being the first one to hand a test in, so I would draw on the back until somebody else handed theirs in. Upon having one German quiz returned, I discovered that the professor had ALSO drawn on the back of my test – a dinosaur drawn chasing soldier I had doodled (who later became George in Redcoats-ish). That worked out better for everyone than whatever B.L. Zebub is doing to that poor computer.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Happy Harbor Comics is the Employee of the Week, and also the reason why I worked a 12 hour day helping run a book fair in Beaumont, AB last week. I was actually happy to help, until I spent an hour in traffic trying to return the fixtures and leftover product to the store. I was much less happy about that. Make me happy by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon, where you’ll be supporting a less evil corporation than… well, most of them.

Next Week: Steve makes puns, Doug makes faces. Learn more of Steve’s punmanship by reading next week’s comic early on Patreon!

Actual Chlamydia

Most strips turn out more-or-less like the final thumbnail sketch of the script, but not drawn as a tiny rectangle full of scribbly lines that are indecipherable to anyone but me. This one ended up changing a lot – it was supposed to be a pretty standard row of five panels, with the inset panel that is panel 2. Then I tried to lay it out on paper, and realized that I had laid it out in the thumbnail and made it too wide, and didn’t actually have room for it to be five panels wide AND fit the dialogue bubbles. The end result is way more visually interesting, I think, and made me a lot happier with the strip than I would have been if it was just a normal five panel layout.

Employee of the Week:

Brien Aronov is the Employee of the Week! We haven’t had a new Employee of the Week in a while – let’s get some new names in the rotation. You can do that by giving some money to the Hell, Inc. Patreon, which is how I pay for things like the website and justifying working on this instead of taking more freelance work.

Next Week: How does a computer get an STD? A theory. Read it early on Patreon!

Work the Butts

The Hockeypocalypse Kickstarter is over (thanks to all of you who pledged your support and helped share the project), and other than some administrative end stuff (making the surveys, sending files to the printer, stuff that doesn’t take much more thought than the effort to type it), I have done pretty much nothing but draw next week’s Hell, Inc. strip and paint Warhammer dudes. First, I painted a bunch of Ork Boyz, and have since moved on to finishing up a Kharadron Overlords Thunderers squad.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Joe Amon is Employee of the Week! While the Hockeypocalypse Kickstarter made a great leap forward, the Patreon took a bit of a step back. At 20 patrons you’re all getting the original Hell, Inc. issues #1 and 2 as physical copies in the mail, so harangue your friends into supporting our favourite capitalist hellscape. Support Hell, Inc. on Patreon – because old, rich white dudes need your money less than I do. Goddamn, how isn’t corporate America banging down my door with genius promo lines like that?

Next Week: After you work the butts, remember that you’re in an Inhuman Resources seminar. Read it early by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon.

Horny For Work

Last chance for the Hockeypocalypse Kickstarter! It’s wrapping up at 5PM MT on Wednesday. Take a few seconds to back it now, and avoid the regret of missing out!

One day I will master digital type on a frosted glass pane on a door. This was a huge improvement over the last attempt, however, which involved giving up and leaving the window un-lettered.

In the original Hell, Inc. comics, this meeting was about harpy safety in the workplace (aka how to be safe from harpies in the workplace). The harpies will show up in this version, at some point, but I haven’t decided on their role in the new story yet.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Still the Hockeypocalypse Kickstarter. Back it, it’s my favourite book I’ve made. Next week, back to patron shoutouts as Employee of the Week. If you want said shoutout, perhaps to promote something of your own, support Hell, Inc. on Patreon.

Next Week: Work the Butts. Find out what that means early on Patreon.

Never Stop Screaming

I spent an unreasonable amount of time trying to figure out what the upsetting thing in the fridge was going to be.

I’ve also been spending an unreasonable amount of time fretting over the new Hockeypocalypse book on Kickstarter. If you like Hell, Inc., go check it out. As of the time of this post, it’s over 60% already, but my broken brain won’t allow me to see that as a positive – all I can see is the 40% that’s left, and agonize over whether things I make actually connect with people. It’s super fun.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Damion is the Employee of the Week, and I think I’m out of factoids that I know about him, so I’ll just go with a sincere thank you for your ongoing support. If you want a sincere thank you, and also want to support my work, head over to the Hell, Inc. Patreon and chip in a few bucks. Or go back up and click that Kickstarter link and get a book for your efforts!

Next Week: Bossly consequences. Bossly is a word now. Read it early on Patreon!

Yo Yo Yo, Kick It

Good News, everyone! The fourth Hockeypocalypse book is launching on Kickstarter at 5 PM Mountain Time (4 PM Pacific, 7 PM Eastern) TODAY! Go buy it.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

It’s Cait of the North, who is essentially an unpaid marketing intern. If you want to be Employee of the Week (or an unpaid marketing intern), hit up the Hell, Inc. Patreon and help support your corporate overlords.

Next Week: Meanwhile, in the fridge…? Also, more Hockeypocalypse plugs, although hopefully you’ve all helped that get funded by then. Read the comic early by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon.

99 Printers and I Forgot Which One

This is definitely the most obnoxiously pleased with myself I’ve been about a strip title so far. As soon as I make several Wu Tang references in the titles, I will reach a very specific kind of nerd apotheosis. B.L. Zebub’s issue with the printer is also something I can identify with recently – I got a new printer, but my computer remembers the old one, and I keep accidentally trying to send things to the old printer. I’m very good at things, you guys. So good.

EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK:

Congratulations, Ben Hamlin, you’re our Employee of the Week, and our Dungeon Master for the Cursed Seas podcast. Statistically speaking, you, the reader, probably listen to The Adventure Zone – so you should also listen to Cursed Seas. Do you want to be Employee of the Week? Of course you do, everyone wants to please their corporate overlords. You can do it by supporting Hell, Inc. on Patreon!

Next Week: B.L. Zebub gets kicky. Is kicky a word? It is now. Read it early on Patreon!